Decision

The day was quite chilly. The sky was overcast, and the rain was drizzling. I could feel the sound of raindrops beating my eardrum. I was at the bus station. I felt like being at the college I recently visited. I was trying to figure out which college would be best for my high school. I remembered how I felt the same things about every college that I went through. But, I could join only one of them.

I went to various famous colleges of Kathmandu valley. Every single college explained their own unique specialities, their friendly and good infrastructures like lab facilities, library, canteen, well- furnished classroom, and so on with better ambience. I was confused and later on, I shortlisted the names of a few colleges with a recommendation of elders.

I had filled the form of entrance exam in two colleges and coincidently, the time of the exam happened to be at the same time. I was in doubt because I had to choose between those two colleges. I never thought in that way. After a while, I sat on the sofa with my spectacles carrying a self-reflective book in one hand with a notebook on another. I was thinking and analyzing which college is better for me. I was in a real dilemma of not knowing which college will lead in which path of life. It took me hours to make a single decision at that time.

It is said that the college we choose and what environment we get will prepare us for competitive, creative and unimagined tomorrow. College life takes a tremendous role in youths’ life. I am also so consumed with a belief in comparing colleges and trying to find a better college. But I wonder about what aspect one is better than another? Comparatively, most of the colleges teach NEB’s curriculum, it’s the same text that all college teaches, teachers of all college are qualified, and every college has a well-furnished classroom that is required for students.

Someone told me to follow the crowd, however, I can’t just rush in any other college that I haven’t heard. Similarly, other suggested joining college which has established a brand. Likewise, some said that this college is better than this, but I questioned in which aspects are you judging?

Each and every student who completed their school level feel a dilemma on choosing colleges because there is a lack of proper information and guiding. I lost my confidence at a certain period. Visiting different colleges, giving many entrance exams, not getting a selected/ scholarship from those colleges that I wanted to study made me sad and upset. I used to stare at the list of colleges which I made to be on.

After a long driving confusion, now I have figured it out and joined a college in Lalitpur.

This was originally published in Republica Daily on September 10, 2019